Time

1 month...My how time flies. This how long I've been on the bus. I can hardly believe it. It's 1 month of determination and pursuit accomplished.

Time is a beautiful thing. It has given me a track record. And a track record I am very proud of. It is 1 month of consistency and constant decision making. And has resulted in me losing 15lbs, so far.

Time is also a dangerous thing. As much as I know I have done, I also feel a sense of anxiousness and discontent. When you put everything you have into a goal, you want to arrive at the finish line quickly. After all, you deserve it, don't you?

Along with this kind of frustration, comes a bit of danger. This very symptom of frustration is enough to derail the train.

But I continue to talk myself through these moments. These thoughts are real and they are okay. Everyone has them. But at this very moment, you are left with a choice. A "vs." if you will.

Sure, you can stop and agree that this is a process that is too much and takes too long to get to where you are going. But what if you convert that frustration into motivation?

If I think about it, I have this battle every day. The only difference is that in my other areas of life, the motivation and the passion come completely naturally. So, this very conversation that seems so raw and so poignant happens deep within and my long standing habit most always wins out.

While I will value time to celebrate my progress, I will keep it at bay. It is just information.

After all, this journey is not a start and stop kind of journey. It is a change in habit and a change in lifestyle. A habit that will have no time line and no ending.

One day these conversations will be muffled and my long standing habit of health and fitness will always win out. More than a race and more than that striking, slinky black dress I see myself in. This is my life long commitment.

*E*